Why do politicians want to make a fool of themselves by getting their photographs embedded in ridiculous places... Some of the public service ads like this one amuse me no ends.
The Beijing Olympics is over... and we (all TV Channels) are over the moon with 3 medals... Doesn't matter a single Phelps or 
Usain Bolt won more than most nations... And I don't quite relate to the over excitement with the 3 medals or even with the post-mortem we always do - on why a country of a billion cant win more... As Vijay mentioned in his blog - a medals tally with GDP factored in is needed, and we may find interesting alterations like Kenya or Jamaica leading the tally.
For last few days... there has been ample debate about Baichung Bhutia's refusal to carry the Olympic Torch when its in
While supporters of Tibetan cause believe that Aamir/Saif should boycott the torch run in support of the Tibetans who have made India their home now... there are many others who suggest that Olympics is not about China and the spirit of the game and all that...
Aamir has explained his own position in his blog here... making clear that he would not boycott - for blah blah reasons. He argues that all governments in the world commit human right violations and thus, its not a reason enough to protest and refuse to associate with the Olympic torch...
Now... if you read between the lines - what he basically wants to say – but doesn't have the balls to say is:
"Coca-Cola,
Come on!!! If Coca-Cola were to get in infrastructure development projects - I would be actually doing events in support of
Forget -
Double standards? Myopia...? Or just plain commerce...
PS:
This takes away nothing from the fact that he is an awesome actor - who made most of India wake-up with TZP... but then he needs to stop acting in real life and get down from that self created high pedestal of free ideology... and admit that its 'pure commerce' that works...
For the record,
And just as the breaking news flashing on screens… now Harbhajan Singh has been handed a 3 match ban for a supposedly racist slur made against Andrew Symonds.
But the ugly underbelly of this match…doesn’t end here.
The three umpires (3rd umpire included) gave a terrible 12 decisions against Indian team…forcing a defeat on
As my wife has been sniffing, Ricky Ponting had a huge prestigious record up for stake – 16 consecutive wins like the one Steve Waugh had earlier. So did he go all-out to ensure the win…? After all, if match fixing can be done by bribing a bunch of players, it’s far easier to fix it by getting just 3 umpires towards you.
Andrew Symonds given not-out thrice and he went on to make a huge score (162). Rickey Ponting given not-out caught behind and he scored double from there on. Steve Bucknor even refusing to refer decisions to third umpire. But what the hell, even the third umpire too acted blind to give wrong decisions in favour of Aussies… Dravid given out today when there was a gap as big as Steve Bucknor’s head between the bat and ball. Ganguly given out by Ricky Ponting – not the umpires. Wasim Jaffer given out on a no-ball. And many more… Heck…
Even if half of these decisions had been given honestly –
But the day ended with even more bizarre news… Harbhajan Singh accused of a racial slur by Aussie all-rounder Symonds. As per known statements of the match refree and the umpires, they didn’t hear or see any thing. The on-screen visuals show that it was Andrew Symonds who walked up to the batsman and said something… Umpires heard no racial comment coming from Singh…the mikes recorded nothing. But since a bunch of white-skinned players are ready to stand witness for their team mate – who were no where close to the either of them when the supposed altercation happened on the pitch; the verdict has been given against Bhajji. The witnesses from
So what’s the picture we get…
If a white player gives witness for something they were no close to – it must be true. No matter if a non-white player was present there on the pitch and says nothing happened. If a white man says he said it, he must have….
If a white player says that the catch was clean – he can’t be lying… No matter what the TV camera’s show. If Ricky picked a catch from turf or
To me – that is racism…!!!
ICC must be banned for owning such a racist game…
While browsing through news channels today evening, I was stopped at NDTV for a while. Prannoy Roy was the news anchor - and thats what amused me and made me stop at the channel - wondering how attrition in his ranks
must be troubling him, like it does in my industry.Normally, I don't like all those "Proud to be an Indian" emails floating around... Not because I am not proud to be an Indian, but because they tend to be make a 'head-in-sand' impression, making Indians revel in the glorious past and ignore the sad state of the present day India..
But when this email came floating bye...for some reason I felt like archiving it here... Maybe it's just the pictures which make it different.
ARYABHATT
(476 CE) MASTER ASTRONOMER AND MATHEMATICIAN
Born in 476 CE in Kusumpur (Bihar), Aryabhatt's intellectual brilliance remapped the boundaries of mathematics and astronomy. In 499 CE, at the age of 23, he wrote a text on astronomy and an unparallel treatise on mathematics called "Aryabhatiyam." He formulated the process of calculating the motion of planets and the time of eclipses. Aryabhatt was the first to proclaim that the earth is round, it rotates on its axis, orbits the sun and is suspended in space - 1000 years before Copernicus published his heliocentric theory. He is also acknowledged for calculating p (Pi) to four decimal places: 3.1416 and the sine table in trigonometry. Centuries later, in 825 CE, the Arab mathematician, Mohammed Ibna Musa credited the value of Pi to the Indians, "This value has been given by the Hindus." And above all, his most spectacular contribution was the concept of zero without which modern computer technology would have been non-existent. Aryabhatt was a colossus in the field of mathematics.
BHASKARACHARYA II
(1114-1183 CE)
GENIUS IN ALGEBRA
Born in the obscure village of Vijjadit (Jalgaon) in Maharastra, Bhaskaracharya's work in Algebra, Arithmetic and Geometry catapulted him to fame and immortality. His renowned mathematical works called "Lilavati" and "Bijaganita" are considered to be unparalled and a memorial to his profound intelligence. Its translation in several languages of the world bear testimony to its eminence. In his treatise "Siddhant Shiromani" he writes on planetary positions, eclipses, cosmography, mathematical techniques and astronomical equipment. In the "Surya Siddhant" he makes a note on the force of gravity: "Objects fall on earth due to a force of attraction by the earth. Therefore, the earth, planets, constellations, moon, and sun are held in orbit due to this attraction." Bhaskaracharya was the first to discover gravity, 500 years before Sir Isaac Newton. He was the champion among mathematicians of ancient and medieval India. His works fired the imagination of Persian and European scholars, who through research on his works earned fame and popularity.
ACHARYA KANAD
(600 BCE)
FOUNDER OF ATOMIC THEORY
As the founder of "Vaisheshik Darshan"- one of six principal philosophies of India - Acharya Kanad was a genius in philosophy. He is believed to have been born in Prabhas Kshetra near Dwarika in Gujarat. He was the pioneer expounder of realism, law of causation and the atomic theory. He has classified all the objects of creation into nine elements, namely: earth, water, light, wind, ether, time, space, mind and soul. He says, "Every object of creation is made of atoms which in turn connect with each other to form molecules." His statement ushered in the Atomic Theory for the first time ever in the world, nearly 2500 years before John Dalton. Kanad has also described the dimension and motion of atoms and their chemical reactions with each other. The eminent historian, T.N. Colebrook, has said, "Compared to the scientists of Europe, Kanad and other Indian scientists were the global masters of this field."
NAGARJUNA (100 CE)WIZARD OF CHEMICAL SCIENCE
He was an extraordinary wizard of science born in the nondescript village of Baluka in Madhya Pradesh. His dedicated research for twelve years produced maiden discoveries and inventions in the faculties of chemistry and metallurgy. Textual masterpieces like "Ras Ratnakar," "Rashrudaya" and "Rasendramangal" are his renowned contributions to the science of chemistry. Where the medieval alchemists of England failed, Nagarjuna had discovered the alchemy of transmuting base metals into gold. As the author of medical books like "Arogyamanjari" and "Yogasar," he also made significant contributions to the field of curative medicine. Because of his profound scholarliness and versatile knowledge, he was appointed as Chancellor of the famous University of Nalanda. Nagarjuna's milestone discoveries impress and astonish the scientists of today.
ACHARYA CHARAK
(600 BCE)FATHER OF MEDICINE
Acharya Charak has been crowned as the Father of Medicine. His renowned work, the "Charak Samhita", is considered as an encyclopedia of Ayurveda. His principles, diagoneses, and cures retain their potency and truth even after a couple of millennia. When the science of anatomy was confused with different theories in Europe, Acharya Charak revealed through his innate genius and enquiries the facts on human anatomy, embryology, pharmacology, blood circulation and diseases like diabetes, tuberculosis, heart disease, etc. In the "Charak Samhita" he has described the medicinal qualities and functions of 100,000 herbal plants. He has emphasized the influence of diet and activity on mind and body. He has proved the correlation of spirituality and physical health contributed greatly to diagnostic and curative sciences. He has also prescribed and ethical charter for medical practitioners two centuries prior to the Hippocratic oath. Through his genius and intuition, Acharya Charak made landmark contributions to Ayurvedal. He forever remains etched in the annals of history as one of the greatest and noblest of rishi-scientists.
ACHARYA SUSHRUT (600 BCE)
FATHER OF PLASTIC SURGERY
A genius who has been glowingly recognized in the annals of medical science. Born to sage Vishwamitra, Acharya Sudhrut details the first ever surgery procedures in "Sushrut Samhita," a unique encyclopedia of surgery. He is venerated as the father of plastic surgery and the science of anesthesia. When surgery was in its infancy in Europe, Sushrut was performing Rhinoplasty (restoration of a damaged nose) and other challenging operations. In the "Sushrut Samhita," he prescribes treatment for twelve types of fractures and six types of dislocations. His details on human embryology are simply amazing. Sushrut used 125 types of surgical instruments including scalpels, lancets, needles, Cathers and rectal speculums; mostly designed from the jaws of animals and birds. He has also described a number of stitching methods; the use of horse's hair as thread and fibers of bark. In the "Sushrut Samhita," and fibers of bark. In the "Sushrut Samhita," he details 300 types of operations. The ancient Indians were the pioneers in amputation, caesarian and cranial surgeries. Acharya Sushrut was a giant in the arena of medical science.
VARAHAMIHIR (499-587 CE)
EMINENT ASTROLOGER AND ASTRONOMERA
renowned astrologer and astronomer who was honored with a special decoration and status as one of the nine gems in the court of King Vikramaditya in Avanti (Ujjain). Varahamihir's book "panchsiddhant" holds a prominent place in the realm of astronomy. He notes that the moon and planets are lustrous not because of their own light but due to sunlight. In the "Bruhad Samhita" and "Bruhad Jatak," he has revealed his discoveries in the domains of geography, constellation, science, botany and animal science. In his treatise on botanical science, Varamihir presents cures for various diseases afflicting plants and trees. The rishi-scientist survives through his unique contributions to the science of astrology and astronomy.ACHARYA PATANJALI (200 BCE)
FATHER OF YOGA
The Science of Yoga is one of several unique contributions of India to the world. It seeks to discover and realize the ultimate Reality through yogic practices. Acharya Patanjali, the founder, hailed from the district of Gonda (Ganara) in Uttar Pradesh. He prescribed the control of prana (life breath) as the means to control the body, mind and soul. This subsequently rewards one with good health and inner happiness. Acharya Patanjali's 84 yogic postures effectively enhance the efficiency of the respiratory, circulatory, nervous, digestive and endocrine systems and many other organs of the body. Yoga has eight limbs where Acharya Patanjali shows the attainment of the ultimate bliss of God in samadhi through the disciplines of: yam, niyam, asan, pranayam, pratyahar, dhyan and dharna. The Science of Yoga has gained popularity because of its scientific approach and benefits. Yoga also holds the honored place as one of six philosophies in the Indian philosophical system. Acharya Patanjali will forever be remembered and revered as a pioneer in the science of self-discipline, happiness and self-realization.ACHARYA BHARADWAJ (800 BCE)
ACHARYA KAPIL (3000 BCE)
PIONEER OF AVIATION TECHNOLOGY
Acharya Bharadwaj had a hermitage in the holy city of Prayag and was an ordent apostle of Ayurveda and mechanical sciences. He authored the "Yantra Sarvasva" which includes astonishing and outstanding discoveries in aviation science, space science and flying machines. He has described three categories of flying machines: 1.) One that flies on earth from one place to another. 2.) One that travels from one planet to another. 3.) And One that travels from one universe to another. His designs and descriptions have impressed and amazed aviation engineers of today. His brilliance in aviation technology is further reflected through techniques described by him:
1.) Profound Secret: The technique to make a flying machine invisible through the application of sunlight and wind force.
2.) Living Secret: The technique to make an invisible space machine visible through the application of electrical force.
3.) Secret of Eavesdropping: The technique to listen to a conversation in another plane.
4.) Visual Secrets: The technique to see what's happening inside another plane.
Through his innovative and brilliant discoveries, Acharya Bharadwaj has been recognized as the pioneer of aviation technology.
FATHER OF COSMOLOGY
Celebrated as the founder of Sankhya philosophy, Acharya Kapil is believed to have been born in 3000 BCE to the illustrious sage Kardam and Devhuti. He gifted the world with the Sankhya School of Thought. His pioneering work threw light on the nature and principles of the ultimate Soul (Purusha), primal matter (Prakruti) and creation. His concept of transformation of energy and profound commentaries on atma, non-atma and the subtle elements of the cosmos places him in an elite class of master achievers - incomparable to the discoveries of other cosmologists. On his assertion that Prakruti, with the inspiration of Purusha, is the mother of cosmic creation and all energies, he contributed a new chapter in the science of cosmology. Because of his extrasensory observations and revelations on the secrets of creation, he is recognized and saluted as the Father of Cosmology.
But yesterday, I got the shock of my life… when in one of her serials on Star Plus, the whole Virani family was shown blatantly promoting “Karyasiddhi Graha Shanti Dhoop”. I didn’t notice the promo till they focussed on the packing which carried Ekta Kapoor’s picture on it. What got my goat was the shameless promotion done in the soap. It seemed like a paid advertisement instead of soap… I for a while thought it was a joke or a spoof, till my wife (who happens to be the know all of tube-world and soaps… and the reason I have to watch this stuff) confirmed that it was indeed a product Ekta had launched in the market.
I am still amused as to why a media house like Balaji Telefilms would diversify into manufacturing ‘dhoop’ and incense sticks – maybe coz it didn’t make sense to make toiletries like toothpaste and shampoo, given their portfolio of soaps sucks… and coz they have 300+ year old brand ambassadors like Baa’ to cash in on.
I was left wondering if people will actually buy this product…imagine buying Graha Shanti Dhoop from Ekta Kapoor – to get the kind peace Aggrawal’s, Bajaj’s, Basu’s, Virani’s etc have in her stories. Damn!!! I would believe this dhoop if anything is a curse – to never-ending family feuds, conspiring relatives, multiple failed marriages, women with multiple husbands, men with multiple affairs and marriages, illegitimate children and what not.
Do you want such ‘Graha shanti’ in your home…? At least I don’t want the kahani of ‘Kahani Ghar Ghar ki’ to be the kahani of my ghar…
Yeah yeah… I know the co-relation is illogical. After-all, using Anchor toothpaste doesn’t mean your teeth get electrified. Huh… but Ekta Kapoor Dhoop… still makes me laugh.
This thread reminds me of another news item from last month which referred to a survey revealing “that jawans posted to remote locations around the country love watching saas-bahu serials to de-stress in hostile terrains”. Do you know how it de-stresses them? Well, simple. They figure out that they could in far more stressful situations back at home than dealing with the terrorists here, just if the “kahani of their homes were to be just a shade of kahanis of Ekta’s homes”
I wonder how many of the 180 million have been spared by the telemarketers so far.
Not many…!!! Must be just a handful of lucky one’s who are yet to get an irritating tele-marketing call.
I, like most of the other harassed customers still get 2-3 calls a week, in spite of having signed up for all DND lists I know of. Most callers’ still don’t understand my disgust and anger – and call back within seconds of me blasting them and cutting the call. Offers for personal/home/auto loans, credit cards, vacation packages, membership to Country club, etc are a routine.
Responses on being asked to not-call again from dumb tele-marketers like this one “Why sir, why don’t you need a loan?” are old news now.
But this one I got the other day just took the cake…
Tele-marketer(TM): Sir, I am calling from XYZ Bank. We have a great offer for you, Sir. We are offering a life time free credit card to all employees of your company.
Me: Wait!!! I don’t want any credit cards, loans, memberships… nothing at all.
TM: Sir, please give me a minute to explain. Sir, we have a special offer going exclusively for your company. All employees of your company can avail of this special offer specially designed for you – since you are our preferred customer.
Me: Wait…!!! How am I your preferred customer? I never dealt with you…
TM: No Sir, your company is our preferred customer.
Me: I am sure my company has no dealing with you at all. My salary account isn’t in your bank either.
TM: Sir, this is a special offer designed for your company only.
Me: Which company? Do you know which company I work for…?
TM: (silence)…
TM: Sir…can you tell me which company you work for?
Me: But you have a special offer specifically designed for my employer. So you should know…
TM: Yes Sir… (silence)
TM: Sir, we can offer this special package for you also, your company too. Employer doesn’t matter. We have given this offer to many companies in
Me: But just 1 minute back it was an exclusive offer just for my company, because of being a privileged customer. Are all IT companies in
TM: (Silence)…
Me: How do you even know I work for an IT company?
TM: (Silence)…
TM: What company you work for then?
Me: Keep guessing… (Cut)
Annu Malik)
judges.
by Laughter Challenge show on StarOne. And well – how could others not copy it to be innovative and different. They have had a long trend of uniqueness in their shows for ages – so what is all the serials in all the channels are the same or even cooked by the same chef. Or when one KBC kicked off a chain of me-too's. Or even the spate of imitation laughter shows flooding the channels.
I should have posted this earlier… but better late than never.
This is just to acknowledge and thank an unknown ‘Good Samaritan’ who came to our rescue at an odd hour – even though we were pre-condition to suspect him.
On our way back from a friends place, we ended up with a flat tyre while driving on the Outer Ring Road stretch between KR Puram and Marathali in
In some time, my friend arrived – and together we tried our hand at getting the jack into the right spot to change the tyre, under the light of a small hand torch. No wonder, the ‘keyboard junkie techies’ that all of us are – we struggled with getting it right for a while.
It took us some time to figure out the right approach – and by that we were already wary of the success we could achieve. While we were still bent down looking under the car and struggling with the jack, a man in late 20’s walked up behind us from no where and asked “Do you need help?”. All three of us looked at him with reasonable hope but also a lot of suspicion. Where did he suddenly come from…? From his looks we mentally graded him as a ruffian and conversed amongst ourselves in our native language – that we should be careful. My friend assured that he had his cricket bat handy in his car boot to ward off a threat – should a need arise. I was glad that I was holding the iron rod/wrench used to raise the jack. But we did need help… so after scanning the surroundings for any hidden accomplices, we reluctantly handed him the wrench…and he instantly got onto the job. And he did indeed know how to change a tyre…unlike three of us “engineering degrees” holders.
10 minutes into the job, tyre was changed and car in shape to run again. By now we were ashamed of our suspicion for the guy and thanking our stars that we didn’t let him know of our suspicion about him. Otherwise it would have been hurtful of a genuine person. Even as we were trying to figure out how to thank him – and what monetary reward we should offer him – he instantly and briskly walked off towards a tempo standing at some distance. Our requests not withstanding, he refused to wait or accept any money. He was actually the driver of that tempo/goods carrier, and having seen us stranded stopped at a distance, just to help us. And here we were all ready to brand him a suspect…
While our suspicion wasn’t altogether unjustified under the current times we live in, we did feel a sense of shame on ourselves (- and also for not being good enough even to change your own tyre).
This post is just a “Thank you” note to the good intentions of every such Indian...
Watching the snapshots of Indian Idol Season-3 today on television, I was left wondering... "What the hell are most of these people thinking?"
Don't get me wrong... of course there are a handful of good talented singers out there.
But what is the vast majority of the crowd out there thinking... worse so what kind of feedback have their friends, parents and well wishers given them. Most of them can't sing a line right... even a stone deaf person can tell that they have no business even singing in their own bathrooms – least of all coming for an audition. Yet there are such characters in hordes' each time, making complete fools of themselves on camera in front of the whole nation.
Are we a nation of hugely delusional people? Or is it a new pass time to prove how stupid you can be to the whole nation? Most of the time, the audition rounds look more like a laughter show than a music talent search... Do these folks really believe that they are 'good' singers… didn't their friends or people at home show them the mirror…? Its actually funnily shocking to see parents and guardians of some of these people get wild when their wards are rejected...Geez!!! smell some coffee.
But then maybe many of them are banking on just being sheer lucky to get a ticket to Mumbai – and then hope that some regional vote bank will catch fancy of them and push their envelope further. It's not impossible – we have seen Qazi Tauqeer get to the top with less than a spoonful of singing talent, or a Sanjay Malakar fight it out for long with just popular vote bank support.
Why does the channel actually show all this to viewers instead of cutting straight to the selected lot? Maybe Sony is indeed fighting the dilemma of combating TRPs of both Star One's Laughter Challenge and Zee's "Music Challenge" at the same time... thereby making the initial rounds of the music search more of a comedy show.
If you thought this service from citibank was bad...here is something that takes the cake...!!!
Here is a snapshot of an actual transaction I have been having with HSBC for over many days…
The back-drop: Sometime in March 2007, HSBC decided to award me a Gold Credit Card in view of my excellent repayment track-record for my existing home loan with them – which has been in existence since 2005. Don’t ask me why they didn’t bother to send the credit card earlier for so long. The world’s local bank was probably sleeping all the time... For some strange reason, I decided to keep it too… basically deciding to consolidate the bunch of dealings with one bank and do away with my Standard Chartered card and HDFC cards… So I sent in the response coupon that came along with the card with a copy of PAN card back to HSBC for activation of the card about 3 weeks ago.
3 weeks gone, several calls made to their call centre – yet the card has not been activated. And here’s just a snapshot of some amusing conversations I have had (over email/online and Phone) with the “Customer Service Executives” (they should rename them as Customer Harassment Executives). The wordings are a close reproduction of the actual exchanges as I recall them…
Me: I am waiting for the activation of my card – I sent in the request for activation 3 weeks ago. Why has not this been activated yet?
HSBC: Yes sir!! We have received your request and its been sent to the concerned dept for processing.
Me: But I talked to an exec earlier who confirmed that the card has been activated. I went to an outlet and it was rejected.
HSBC: Yes Sir… your card is activated.
Me: Then why did it get rejected at the shop when it was swiped.
HSBC: Sir, it will work after activation.
Me: Urrrrgh… So it is not activated yet…You just said it is activated.
HSBC: Please be on hold…(hold for ages and back with same confusion)… Sir your card activation has been sent to concerned department.
Me: So when will it get activated.
HSBC: (Again put on hold…) sorry to put you on hold…Sir please send us your response coupon and PAN Card copy through post or drop it at any HSBC drop box - and we will activate it within 2-3 days.
Me: But I have already sent the activation coupon and PAN card copy and you confirmed its been received.
HSBC: Yes sir…
Me: So then why another response coupon and request…?
HSBC: (again put on hold)… Sir, please send us a scanned copy of response coupon and PAN card over email to info@hsbc.co.in with reference no 1954556.
Me: Urrgh… how can I send it to you. I already sent it once.
HSBC: No problem sir…just send us a scanned copy of response coupon over email.
Me: Is this rocket science? I told you I don’t have the response coupon anymore because I sent it already to HSBC. So how will scan it for you?
HSBC: Yes sir…that’s right sir. But we will need the response coupon for this activation.
Me: Darn!!! You don’t get it. Why the hell do you need all this anyways? What are you trying to validate/verify from the response form.
HSBC: Sir, your PAN card details, address etc needs to be recorded.
Me: Damn!!! You already know my address – you sent me the card on it. What the hell? I am an existing customer of HSBC – have had a home loan from HSBC for over 2 years now. Why isn’t verification enough?
HSBC: (again put on hold)… Yes Sir, you are an existing customer and seeing your record with us only we have offered you this Gold card.
Me: Good… so why the fuss over a response coupon for verification when you know who I am already? So can u get it activated now…
HSBC: No sir… we need the PAN card copy and response coupon for verification to activate the card.
Me: To hell with your card. Just cancel it… I don’t know why I even bothered to ask for activation. I have a bunch of cards already – I better not bother with this anymore. Please cancel it.
HSBC: Sorry Sir… I will file an issue on this and one of our senior executives will call you in 2 hours. Is 98xxxxxxxx your contact number?
Me: Yes… but forget it. Just cancel it.
HSBC: Thank you sir… We will call you back.
It’s been 3 days… yet HSBC’s 2 hours haven’t ended yet. That’s the World’s local bank for you !!!
This weekend I received my account statements from Citibank N.A through a courier at my residence address. It contained the usual stuff – few pages of quarterly bank statement, statement of my credit card dues and also a page for the reward points. However, right at the end, stapled along with the 5 sheets was 6th one – carrying the Statement of Annual interest credited.
First I was amused and confused – I never received any interest from the bank through whole of the year (April 2006-March2007). Then how come this statement claims that 5 figure amount had been credited as interest into my account on so and so dates. I was shocked, confused and at same time thrilled – was I about to get some money which I didn’t know I was supposed to get. But on the other side I was sure I wasn’t due to get any interest – since I don’t park much funds in this account at all.
Few scalp scratches later – I found that the bank had been kind enough to share this confidential banking information of another customer (who incidentally is also a colleague at work). I tried calling the Call centre today to lodge a complaint – but then after few minutes of wait – dropped the call. Those call centre people will not do any thing more than their parroted answers “We apologize for the inconvenience caused. We assure this will not happen again” – all of which are ridiculously useless responses. And they will make sure that any demands to talk to a senior person will be rewarded with a “Please be hold while I transfer you to my supervisor” and then an endless wait. Only God knows where those ever elusive senior personnel always are.
I resorted to a lesser headache method – filed an online complaint (Reference no. 4207047763). I know, I know… there answers won’t be any different. After all they are from the manual Customer Harassment manual that the phone guys have been tutored from – but at least I save myself the hassle of being on endless ‘hold the call’ – which is a literal pain in the neck. Moreover, none of these banks offer you a Toll Free helpline – so you are expected to pay for telling them their mistakes as well.
Anyways the inconvenience caused is not mine alone. While I am still fretting and worried about which all places my confidential bank statements might have gone to – the colleague whose statement was made public to me won’t even be apologized to. (Of course, I handed over his document to him in due confidentiality).
So next time some agency asks your for a bank statement or a proof of income – you can as well approach Citibank. They will be able to oblige by giving you bank statements and other confidential information of whatever kind you need.
There is a dangerous virus being passed around electronically, orally, and
By hand. This virus is called Worm-Overload-Recreational-Killer (WORK).
If you receive WORK from any of your colleagues, your boss, or anyone else
Via any means DO NOT TOUCH IT. This virus will wipe out your private life
Completely.
If you should come into contact with WORK put your jacket on and take two
Good friends to the nearest grocery store. Purchase the antidote known as
Work-Isolating-Neutralizer-Extract (WINE) or
Bothersome-Employer-Elimination-Rebooter (BEER). Take the antidote
Repeatedly until WORK has been completely eliminated from your system.
You should forward this warning to 5 friends. If you do not have 5 friends,
you have already been infected and WORK is controlling your life.
It’s the Budget season again…and every one has a guess on what PC might have in store this Feb 28th. There is guesswork at play whether he will reduce the tax slab, move to EET for most tax exempt savings, increase the saving limits, reduce VAT on housing projects, waive off FBT, etc… Let me not add to any guess work. On contrary I have some suggestions for PC – steps which will yield him much higher tax collections, and hopefully that can allow him to give some respite to a common man like me.
Some new taxes should be imposed on
This must have happened to every other Kashmiri… As I said, Kashmiri’s can recognize another Kashmiri by facial recognition. A long nose, a specific angular jaw line, a certain cut of the brow or a tone of skin – there is always something that makes a Kashmiri go ‘S/he must be a Kashmiri’ – Pandits or Muslims alike.
And at times, your face is such a give away – that in spite of trying you can’t hide the fact that you are a Kashmiri.
More than a decade ago – I was at a training program in Mussorie. Among my group of friends – who were also attending that same event – was Harsh (from Jaipur) who had just recently become a proud new uncle. His nephew was barely a year old and he wanted to take back home a special gift for the kid. Somehow he had got fixated on a fur coat with a cap which he had seen in a “Kashmir Art and Handicraft” shop on the
Alarmed by the fabled tales of how Kashmiri traders dupe unsuspecting tourists by charging them 1000/- for a 100/- buck item, I warned Harsh against buying anything from the Kashmiri shop lest he was ready to get duped. But Harsh couldn’t find anything else as interesting and apt for his nephew – so he was adamant on striking a bargain. In all my naivety, I too became a silent partner to the adventure – agreeing to help him evaluate the right bargain by using my Kashmiri expertise. However, we strongly admonished Harsh from making it known to the dealer that he had a Kashmiri friend along with him to ensure that he was being asked the right price. As per plan, I and another friend decided to enter the shop only once Harsh had selected the piece he wanted to buy and the bargaining was to begin – coming in as customers unrelated to Harsh and give an opinion on the bargain – without revealing the Kashmiri identity.
But as luck would have it – the moment I stepped into the showroom, the patron there had a loud – “Aslaam waleykum!! Pandit ji yapaer kithkaen” to greet me.
Today I spent a good time of an otherwise fine Saturday – roaming the markets of
Armed with a basic shortlist of 4-5 models: Nokia 5300, Nokia 5200, Sony 
Ericsson 700i, Sony Ericsson W550i/Z550i, Motorola Rizr Z3, LG Chocolate, Samsung Ultra X820, I went around hopping from one showroom/dealer to another – looking for the right bargain. But the hop-a-shop exercise turned out to be a rather interesting one – leaving a confused, undecided and rather introspecting me head back home without a new handset.
Having used my old Nokia 3530 to death and then the current Samsung one to its live-a-day battery state now, I must confess that I am not the current to the trend type of a person. I am not the one to buy a new model or the latest in-thing just because it’s cool and it’s in – unless I need it. Old school… I guess.
And somehow I did convince myself that the need of having to recharge my cell phone every night – is reason enough to get a new one.
But it didn’t seem so easy after all – at least for the old school person I am. Hey, but I am still on the right side of age and right side of the yuppie generation. But it didn’t help me when the sales guy would try to edge me towards a pricier model – for obvious reason – by just highlighting the additional features it had. “Sir, this has a 1.3 megapixel camera, this even has a flash, this even has a memory slot extendable to 2GB. You can carry all your music”… and I kept thinking of a Nokia ad which tried to tell us that “phone sirf baat karne ke liye nahi hota hai”. Nokia did well for them selves – but did the customer really need all that. I am not so sure anymore.
Why are we so obsessed with getting everything into and onto a single device? First it was getting your watch and alarm clock merged into the cell phone, then it added your personal organizer, then your money manager, then it some video games, then it also replaced your camera, and then the FM radio, and walkman music player, then email and the works. All in one single device.
What next do we need in our cell phone – a mini-refrigerator? Or a cell phone on which I can actually sit and go to work.
Some of the sales pitch the sales guys wanted me to buy into just turned me off – and I was left counting the existing devices which I barely used. I have a Canon Powershot A590 5MP digital camera – a great camera which I barely use. I have a 1GB Creative Zen MP3 Player which again is lying somewhere around… My wife hasn’t used the camera or the music player on her Motorola V3i much either. If I am not the customer who is really using so many of the existing products or features they have – why am I even looking at a cell phone which has more of the same stuff?
Maybe one reason is that somewhere inside me I am trying to silently fit into the crowd – a society where upgrades every quarter have become a norm. Its not that I couldn’t entirely afford some of those models – but I wasn’t convinced at the end of the touch and feel exercise that spending 15k of my good hard earned money on something – of which I was going to use only 5k worth of features was a good bargain. If I am not the tech savvy gizmo freak kind of nerd – or the ‘cool hang out in the right gang’ kind of kid around the block – nor the image conscious techie who needs to make a point about the designation he has arrived – then why do I need the N and E or the P or Q series of the latest gadget. But the market will still ensure that you are told what you ought to buy… what is the right thing you should be seen with? The sales agents were probably second guessing my salary and thereby what budget they should make me raise the bar to.
As I said, the whole exercise left me all the more confused and I returned empty handed – still
wondering at 5AM right now… am I being too much of an ‘old school’.
Maybe I am asking a blasephemous question at a time when there is all the new buzz about the iPhone - and even more blasephemous given that my own bread and butter depends on people adopting newer technology...
At the end of Nokia 5300, 6270, N72, N83, SE 880, SE 770, Moto Ming, Ping ting, Pebble, RAZR, RIZR, KRZR… Krazy kiya re!!!
Blood Diamond – starring Leonardo DiCaprio
Why are we Indian’s obsessed with foreign acceptance?
This is the question that has been frustrating me today…
Earlier today – I saw a not so well known TV actor Gaurav Chopra (has been seen in some TV soaps on Zee/Star Plus and also recently as the first round elimination along with his live-in partner Narayani Shastri on “Nach Baliye”) giving a loooooong interview to a TV news channel – about his part in the Hollywood blockbuster “Blood Diamond”… and his interactions with Leonardo DiCaprio. He even had anecdotes to share on how he was mistaken for an Italian football star – and how he and Leonardo had their trailers parked side by side….and the learnings he had from Leanardo about not having starry tantrums like the other stars in Bollywood do. Quite a lot of learning from less than 5 seconds of screen time with him…
Mistaken by this bravado – I went ahead and watched the movie later today…
Much like Mallika Sherawat’s much hyped appearance in “The Myth” which didn’t last more than two minutes… Gaurav’s appearance turned out to be lesser than that a 30-seconds long with barely an un-heard dialogue “there is no space inside”.
Had the TV channel even bothered to find out what he was upto in the movie...? What did Gaurav think before making such long statements...
What made Gaurav come on national television with such hype and pride? Maybe he thought not many will see the movie anyway (which is probably true) and yet he will get away with some brownie points… and some better scope with the talent hunters for the next soap on air… Or is it the sheer over powering urge we Indians have with getting a phoren’ stamp – be it the ‘now here now gone’ appearances of Gulshan Grover in Hollywood flicks which he doesn’t tire speaking about or be it the - ‘I will get an H1 before marriage at any cost’ attitude of each and every South Indians…we want a stamp of ‘phoren’ acceptance – irrespective of whether its worth anything at all. I have seen a few good close friends, who delayed getting married around the 2001 slowdown – just because they didn’t want to marry without an H1 stamped on their passports, bore the costs of their visa’s by paying the bodyshoppers, went to USA and hunted for tech jobs at their own cost – and once finally industry turned around and they stuck some good luck – they did get married too, the same traditional way they would have got married a good 2 years ago. But aaah… they wouldn’t have had the foreign colour to they visa that time.
Why is every Indian obsessed with when Aishwarya is doing her next Hollywood film, when Amitabh or Hrithik will break into a Los Angel’s movie career or what happened to Salam Khan’s Hollywood escapade “Marigold”, and what even an otherwise not-so-starry Kabir Bedi did in Hollywood or the American soaps like “Bold and Beautiful”…or when Sush will be seen alongside Richard Gere…or they never ending question - Oscar?
Be it the movie arena, or be it the whites adopting our age-old yoga, ayurveda, pranayama techniques or vedic thoughts - we seem to acknowledge and accept faster once the west has given a stamp of approval.
Are we still living in a colonial past…? Are we still burdened with the load of acceptance by the white skin…?
OLD VERSION...
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks the ant's a fool and laughs & dances & plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter so he dies out in the cold.
MODERN VERSION…
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks the ant's a fool and laughs & dances & plays the summer away. Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving.
NDTV, BBC, CNN show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food.
The World is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be that this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?
Arundhati Roy stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house. Medha Patkar goes on a fast along with other grasshoppers demanding that grasshoppers be relocated to warmer climates during winter. Amnesty International and Koffi Annan criticize the Indian Government for not upholding the fundamental rights of the grasshopper. The Internet is flooded with online petitions seeking support to the grasshopper (many promising Heaven and Everlasting Peace for prompt support as against the wrath of God for non-compliance). Opposition MP's stage a walkout. Left parties call for "Bharat Bandh" in
Lalu Prasad allocates one free coach to Grasshoppers on all Indian Railway Trains, aptly named as the 'Grasshopper Rath'.
Finally, the Judicial Committee drafts the Prevention of Terrorism against Grasshoppers Act [POTAGA]", with effect from the beginning of the winter.
Arjun Singh makes Special Reservation for Grass Hopper in educational Institutions & in Govt Services.
The ant is fined for failing to comply with POTAGA and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the Government and handed over to the grasshopper in a ceremony covered by NDTV.
Arundhati Roy calls it "a triumph of justice". Lalu calls it 'Socialistic Justice'. CPM calls it the 'revolutionary resurgence of the downtrodden' Koffi Annan invites the grasshopper to address the UN General Assembly. The writer of this piece is condemned as an anti-national and anti-social right wing radical with no regard for the poor and downtrodden grasshopper...
Many years later...The ant has since migrated to the
Another year passes by this weekend. Old calendars will be replaced with new ones on the wall – where ever they are still used… Some will party through the weekend, others still wondering what to do…I am probably one among the others… For a few days now, I have been beleaguered with the question on what my plan for the New Years Eve is… every one seems to have a standard question on this. I wonder if not having any plan is a plan in itself… I can claim it to be so – if I can loan from what PV Narasimha Rao once said about his governments’ indecision on Ayodhya issue “Deciding not to take a decision is a decision too”.
Well, that’s it for me… I have decided not to have a plan. For that matter, I am still clueless how the New Years is any different. Unless you are sure of dying within next one year, every other day is a New Year day…. Ok…somewhat over philosophical… I take that back. Neither do I want to get into a rant of how New Years is a western celebration…
Actually my dilemma is more basic…wife is out of town, friends are busy parenting this weekend, work is on a slow lane – a long weekend (two in succession actually) suddenly looks too much of a respite. Though I have a pretty long ‘to-do list’… I am not sure if that would count as a decent plan to have for the New Years…
So in nut-shell I am still looking for a socially acceptable answer to “What’s the plan for New Years”…
Another question that’s likely to rounds next is – “What new year resolutions (NYR) did you make?”… Damn!!! This never goes out of fashion… Somehow cliché’ never killed it….
It still lives… in spite of the fact that NYRs are just that…resolutions for that day – with a shelf life of barely a few weeks into January. Actually I do have a good claim to having kept an old NYR… when I resolved not to make any more NYRs.
I don’t know why you are still reading this totally boring post – I am just yanking off at the keyboard just to alleviate my own boredom.
The mass emails wishing me well for the New Year are back… wonder how many of them would care to send these wishes if they had to pay for those e-cards or emails.
News Channels and papers are back too with their routine New Year masala’s…
Vote for the Man of the Year… Indian of the Year, NRI of the Year, Bangalorean of the year, Mumbaikar of the year, Chinch-pokli’te of the year, Politician of the year, Sportsman of the year, Actor of the year, Item girl of the year, Reality show hero of the year, Idiot of the year,...
(Bore of the year (this post is my self-nomination))… If you want to vote for me...please send an SMS instructing your bank to transfer money to my account.
Kya tamasha hai…? Actually it just doesn't stop there... there are also contests on for phone of the year, car of the year, bike of the year, Mp3 player of the year, pyjama of the year, underwear of the year.... and so on. Don't worry - the latter categories too will come next year for real...
TIME just kept it simple this year – announcing that YOU and I all; are the winners… Wonder why YOU and I lost last year though…and all the previous years… Damn!!! They didn’t even tell me so far…
New year's day seemed to have some meaning sometime back... or maybe it was just the childhood factor - when you try to seek some pleasure and meaning in everything. A new calendar actually used to be brought - and first thing one would do was to note down which day birthdays and holidays were on... The New Year eve TV shows were the celebration event for the family... Thank God there was no 'remote' back then to spoil the fun.Take One more look... Doesn't it seem as if India was chasing and he win the winning shot!!! | |
The win over
Indian cricket has been reeling under the pressure of too much of media attention – there is a good feel factor about this success – since the victory came on the shoulders of the not-so in the prime stars. Sreesanth – with or without his antics – was brilliant. Zaheer was dropped and recalled not too long ago… Sourav and VVS have been in and out – the former captain having gone through the worst phase of his career in last 6 months or so.
Kumble – in spite of being the old war-horse of the team and having feats not lesser than those of any of the other stars in the team – is never for some reason given the star treatment…
The tigers on paper for once rocked as a team – instead of individual dazzles…
But even today, when the team just needed to complete some formalities for the win - the age-old skepticism was alive in the fans… each of us wondering inside us – will it really happen. Each of us scared that there was still a possibility for the team to goof it up from even such a strong position. Hasn’t it happened so many times earlier… Pollock smashing a few too many gave some such scares… Is it that the confidence of Indian cricket fan has been shaken and smashed so often, that we don’t believe it till the bails are still on.
Will this ever change?
As an Indian cricket fan – I am scared. Would this one win again set the team back on its complacency track – get them back in front of more camera’s shooting more endorsements – or would it really help the team get up and running from now on…?
As usual – I still have my fingers crossed – hoping for the best…
Yesterday there was one more news story in all the news channels – Sanjay Dutt performing a pooja/havan in Siddhivinayak temple – we all know why?
This sort of had a deja-vu… or rather a news burn-out effect on me. Why is it that every second day there is a news item of someone visiting
I have come believe now that all TV news channels have a dedicated team of reporter/camera-man deputed permanently to watch the visitors in this temple now…It’s a great place for celebrity spotting and getting some scoops for news… Whether its some one coming to pray for a favourable judgment in the courts, or reality show contestants coming in to pray for more SMS’s in their favour, or cricketers for finding favour with selectors, wannabe leaders or have been leaders just before the election results, parents and family members of ‘Big boss’ hostages, the finalists of Indian Idol or Nach Baliye, or someone from Ekta Kapoor pack emoting for a dying ‘husband’… yahan sabh milta hai!!!
So why go elsewhere pleading and begging some so-called celebrity for news bites… you get them fresh and easy here – served to you on a pooja thaali.
For years, star crazy Indian’s have flocked to
Well... finally it’s a Win!!!
Doesn’t matter if it comes after a pitiable six months of lowly performance… A win makes an incorrigible Indian cricket fan forget everything.
More so, if it’s a win on foreign soil…
And immediately – all those so-far disheartened fan’s will come back to life...again churning out their unbeatable strategies for India, unlimited game plans to win the World Cup few months down the line… un-solicited suggestions for Guru Greg and Dravid…
This one win will keep the enthusiasm alive through all the defeats from now till World Cup... that last wicket today instantaneously made all of us forget all the previous humiliations… And yeah!!! Suddenly we are all back to believing that the World Cup is ours for taking…
And by the way – if you didn’t see this on TV - do enjoy this one from Sreesanth
I have failed to rationalize why Indian’s are so crazy about cricket… Is it the last vestige of our awe for the Britisher’s…or is it that the Indian psyche’ has got bogged down so much that we don’t believe we have a better chance of beating anyone at anything else – and the wonder of 1983 is still something we lick on to…
Regards
An incorrigible Indian Cricket fan... Sudhrenge nahi
Marathi becomes mandatory in all schools in state
This is back...
First it was the 'Kannada' compulsion... now the bug has bitten the
Now same realization have dawned upon the neighbouring state -
Mother Tongue politics has been an old ploy for whipping emotions and getting masses swayed. Politicians are at it again now...
But why?
India, whether some like it or not, is the slowly becoming a powerful back office of the world - a position which is strongly impacting in a positive way the economic footing of a wide range of Indian people. The ITES industry alone is projected to create more than 3 million jobs in another 2-3 years... lots of such feel-good projections. The numbers can be off by some factor - but none of these politicians and so-called champions of mother-tongue can deny that the outsourcing industry has been a boon of sorts for
But the government is now out to kill it...
The colonial rule of the Britisher's gave India the English education - wherein almost any educated youth is a multi-linguist - knowing at least English, Hindi and his/her mother tongue. The wide spread understanding and skills with English - the local pronunciations and variants not withstanding has given us the edge in the BPO sector for sure. Today, masses in the west are scared of getting "Bangalored" - meaning they could loose their job to an English speaking Malayalee or a Kannadiga youngster still in some Indian city.
Something this young lad could snatch just because his ancestors were subjugated and over-powered by the English speaking whites.
One could call it - divine retribution. Today low cost Asian countries are in a way reverse colonialising these jobs. But instead of building power around this, the short-sighted politicians of
I don't deny that Indian languages and culture is a valuable asset which needs to be protected, valued and enriched - and the local languages are the key to that.
But learning to speak and read your mother tongue need not be done from a schooling system - let the schooling system focus on imparting marketable skills to the masses.
I saw an interview by this NCP politician - Jeetendra Awhad - a self-styled champion of the 'mandate Marathi' campaign on TV a day ago - and Mr Awhad has a concern that in spite of being a Marathi by birth and born to Marathi speaking parents (himself), his daughter in 8th standard can't speak Marathi. So it’s the fault of the school she goes to...because they taught her to speak English, made her good at Physics, chemistry, biology, History, geography etc - but not Marathi.
My dear Awhad - I would first request you to demand compulsory "Parenting schooling" for parents like you. It should be made a constitutionally mandatory - because I would call your parenting a failure.
I was born in a Kashmiri family, where parents and grand parents spoke in Kashmiri to me - and that’s how I learnt the mother tongue despite the fact that the language was NEVER taught in school.
Mr. Awhad and his ilk need to accept that they are forcing the schooling system to do what the parenting system was meant to done.
So Mr. Awhad needs to get out of the bad parenting habit of talking to their kids in English at home - just because its cool to do so; and impart the mother tongue to them.
After all Mother Tongue - is what one gets from mother - at home, not a teacher in school, else it would have been called "Teacher Tongue"...
But today, just 2-3 days after the previous instance, we encountered this once again. Today - 20th December 2006, at about 6-6:30pm we went to the Big Bazaar, on
Picked up a lot of usual items, juices, groceries etc…
Somewhat alert after the previous post – we were conscious to track the billing. And guess what, as expected there were the usual con jobs…
The billing agent at the counter swiped the barcode reader on a ‘Sundrop – 1 litre pack’ – and guess what – instead of an MRP price of Rs. 73/-, it billed Rs 80/-. Another item – a pack of ‘Everest Masala’ had an MRP of Rs 42/- but the bill screen recorded it as Rs 49/- after the barcode swipe.
Now that we were constantly watching this – we interrupted the agent on the spot. As expected, the first response was ‘Sir, bar code error’… and he quietly tried to enter the price manually. But we were adamant that we wanted to speak to the manager. Our constant requests were avoided – by the agent and the few other agents who gathered there. On persistent insistence, one agent supposedly went off to get the manager – returning in 2 minutes to say that manager wasn’t present at that time.
What? The “Biggest Big Bazaar” doesn’t have a manager!!! It was obvious that they were avoiding it…
But we didn’t intend to budge – and a system hang added to the wait time at the counter anyway. Since we refused to move further – the agents brought forward a newbie looking chap to us – as the manager. Somehow I was not convinced that this was the manager – and the “temporary badge” gave him away. On being confronted on his role, he chickened out – saying that he was a trainee manager. Not sure what that means. Once again we were back to the demanding that the manager show up. Now the so called trainee manager went out in supposed search for the manager. No sign of the manager still.
My wife took it on herself to go hunt out the big man – only find on 1st floor that the big man and the trainee were yapping away. On seeing her approach, they made a quick haste towards the billing counter as if they were
Finally 30 minutes into the imbroglio – the manager did show.
So the manager - Mr. Aftab Alam came to the counter and readily started shouting at the billing agents – I don’t know why. They were acting to the script… So was Mr Aftab Alam extending the script as well... The manager was however not ready to agree that this was a reoccurring problem. Instead to make a show of concern, he asked someone to take off all the items (Sundrop/Everest) from the displays and not to sell them anymore. A good show was put up to make us feel that this was just an inadvertent mistake… Till a day ago I too would have fallen for it.
But not anymore – and here is more of why?
More user distress records…
http://www.mouthshut.com/review/Big_Bazaar-115061-1.html
http://www.mouthshut.com/review/Big_Bazaar-113747-1.html
http://www.mouthshut.com/review/Big_Bazaar-113361-1.html
http://www.mouthshut.com/review/Big_Bazaar-97815-1.html
….oh too many of them out there… and so far I only looked up only mouthshut.com
Wonder what Big Biyani is doing… you don’t become a Walmart of India by cheating customers…
I am increasingly convinced that there is something to this by design…
For long there have been 'chor bazaars' in some corner of Indian cities, where a buyer got some useful stuff for cheap - just because someone somewhere had been robbed.
Is this the retail model of it now...?
through ECS from my own account. However, this is where the issue began. Unknowingly, the connection was recorded by Airtel as ‘company owned’ connection – even though they had a direct ECS paying for it. And my name would appear only as a “user:” in the bills. Fine… not unless I wanted to get any change of service done. So, each time I needed to change a plan, activate or deactivate roaming, ask for a duplicate bill etc, they would force me to get the company executive to send this request – pretty painful.And apparently the Airtel guy had done this quick fix to lots of other employees in my office to snare in quick customers. So – our office requested Airtel to fix this issue enmass. As a result a camp was held in our office on May 19th 2006. Great !!! But little did I realize that they had again sent a DSA – who cared only about selling new connections that day. The DSA ‘Raghav’ from InformAcc (Airtel) collected all my documents (address, identity proof, new ECS activations, salary proof for waiver of deposits, photograph etc) – and I was assured that the change of ownership of my existing number would be done in no time.
Weeks passed… months passed… Still no change…
DSA Dance
I kept calling Raghav – and he assured me that he has submitted the documents to Airtel office in Bannerghatta,
Finally, one day in June 2006, Airtel says they have no got the documents at all – and I need to resubmit. Why? God knows… I try to call InformAcc and they say Raghav is no more with them – and its not their headache what he did to my documents. I raised requests with Airtel to ask to see if my documents were misused – they say they don’t know…they can’t help?
I was finally forced to resubmit fresh set documents to Airtel for the change of ownership – but neither Airtel nor InformAcc has so far come back with an answer on what happened to my earlier set of documents. I wonder if I should go and file a FIR against this – lest Raghav (who is nowhere to be traced now) should have misused my documents.
Airtel shrugs off any responsibility of its own DSA partners.
Wonder what I as a customer should do next time you have to deal with another DSA – whether telecom service provider, a bank or any other agency? Maybe I should ask for a copy of personal identity proof (voter id, DL, ration card etc) in addition to seeing his company ID – before dealing with the person.
Customer Service
Funny name for no-service… It should be called Customer harassment service. During the course of this issue and even later (issues didn’t end with the conversion) I must have talked to about 50 Airtel customer ‘service’ executives over the 121 call centre. I have talked to all kinds of agents – umpteen Preeti’s/Sanjay’s/Vanitha’s/Santosh’s/Ajay/Vijay and who not – and each time having to repeat the story of my agony. Having put several service requests and quoting the service ticket numbers “9105867/9380722/10217862” not-withstanding…
Sending emails to the 121@airtelindia.com doesn’t help either – because for each such mail you promptly get an automated response assuring you
“Thank you for writing to us. We will revert to you within 24 hours.”
But these “24 hours” in Airtel time can mean 24 months too… And it’s so frustrating to see this email response – when the complaint itself is that my previous complaints haven’t been responded to/addressed so far even after weeks.
I have repeatedly replied ‘No’ to the SMS customer satisfaction query – but did Airtel ever bother to take note. Never!!!
Backend Front-End… Agony to no end…
Wonder if you have seen the Airtel subscriber registration form. A pink coloured form which you need to fill when applying for a new connection. I was made to fill it again even though mine was not a new connection. Fine – no arguments…
So I filled the form and handed it over to the new DSA (Deepak) who came to pick it up from my office – and gave him all the documents (id/address proofs, cheque/ECS etc) and attached a photograph in the top right hand corner of the form – exactly as per the space given. The space in the form is for a stamp size photograph and I duly complied.
A week later, Deepak returned demanding a bigger (passport size instead of stamp size) photograph. When I demanded to know why they couldn’t honour what they had asked for in the form in first place – he had a simple reason “Backend people are not accepting stamp size. Doesn’t matter what the form specifies”
What is this ‘backend’ people – are they some Airtel agency… something TRAI set up. If its Airtel people, why don’t they see what the form has. Why don’t they change the form instead and provide a bigger space…
As expected – Deepak had no answer – neither did any of Vanitha’s over the call centre.
Privacy Doomed!!!
So – I finally did get my number converted to self-owned (yeah!! But again 6 weeks after the fresh set of documents and fresh bigger photograph was given to them).
But Airtel unilaterally chose to disable my national roaming etc – without caring to inform me – leaving me stranded during a visit out of
My web account access (to http://www.airtelworld.com/ portal) was also suddenly disabled – weeks after the conversion. More than a dozen service requests raised with 121 are still unaddressed. I can’t imagine why it takes umpteen days to just reset a password. The “Send an SMS ‘web password’ to 121” method has given me “sorry – unable to process this request. Try again later” response several dozen times.
To top it all, after I lost it once and demanded they activate the access right away – I received an email apologizing for not having given me the billing information (When did I ask that?) and enclosed 3 Airtel bills in pdf format (no password). I was shocked to find that these were billing details of some hapless Airtel customer “Mr Guhan Kumar” resident of Malleshpalya,
Airtel has rewarded me with the full knowledge of what calls Mr Guhan has made right from Sept 2006… not that I know who Mr Guhan is – or care to know. I actually feel sorry for him and all unknowing customers like me – whose personal information is being ill-treated by shabby customer ‘harassment’ executives in Airtel.
On receiving these pdf bills of Mr Guhan (and still not getting the web portal access I had asked for) – I shot back a strongly worded email to 121@airtelindia.com – and here is a snapshot of the standard so-called apology I got back.
Dear Mr. (my name),
Thank you for contacting Airtel contact center.
With reference to your e-mail dated 14/12/06 expressing concern over receiving wrong bills, at the outset we regret for the inconvenience caused to you in this regard. We would like to assure you that, we at Airtel are committed to providing you with the highest levels of customer service. To maintain this service parameter, we ensure strict adherence to protecting our customer?s privacy. All information pertaining to our customer database is highly confidential and we have not at any time shared any of our customer details save for information required by any other persons.
We realize that this situation must have greatly inconvenienced you. We are a customer centric organization and as such would want every interaction you have with us to be a pleasant one.
We would also like to inform you that necessary action has been taken and the same would not recur in the future.
On rare occasions, like experienced by you, we fully recognize the shortcoming and take the responsibility to provide you with superior personalized service.
We take this opportunity to assure you of better services in the future. It?s our privilege to have you as our customer and look forward to a long association with you.
Should you require any further clarification or assistance, please reply to us via email at 121@airtelindia.com or fax us on 9845500121 or 9845600121.
We value your association with Airtel.
Warm regards,
Ubaidullah
Customer Support Service
(Underlining emphasis is mine…)
The lines underlined so much belie the facts… they don’t give a damn. If they really did, was an apology sent to Mr Guhan as well. I bet not…
The claim of being a customer centric organization made me laugh… and worry at the same time. Worried – because I don’t know who all have been given my earlier billing details.
I actually called up Mr Guhan and alerted him of how Airtel had compromised him…and guess what, he was already pissed off with many other issues he was facing with them.
I still wonder if it was any use alerting – after all there are probably scores of such compromised customers out there…Its the Service Provider who needs to wake up...
By the way, I am still waiting for my web access!!!
Had the customers not been vigilant enough in the above cases, they wouldnt have noticed how they ended up paying way above the price tag - while believing that they got a bargain.
Sounds and looks funny... but this is true. You probably saw this picture already on the front page of Times of India (
It isn't off place to find a new big swanky car worth more than a cool million rupees... negotiate a foot deep pothole on the left side and a heap on the right... resulting in a tilt which almost gives an impression of the driver and the passenger being in two different floors.
An amusement of witnessing these wobbly drives aside -
Bangalore may soon be the first city to have a full WiMax network... its the silicon plateau of India, its the jewel of brand India,... but its still going to take an hour for a 5km drive in Bangalore any day. And it doesn't look like it will change anytime soon.
The irony is – that techie’s (I hate the term techie as a classification for anyone working in IT industry… but anyway, it’s the one that sticks) are ridiculed and criticized if they complain about lack of infrastructure in the city. Politicians of all kinds want to have a pro-rural image – especially after the debacle of pro-Industry CM’s like Chandrababu Naidu and SM Krishna. So, raising the infrastructure concerns of the people is a vote-bank killer.
Which brings me to the moot point – why is it so?
Election-day is just a holiday to be optimized for most of us (yeah, I am a so-called techie too). If polling is scheduled on a Monday or a Friday, its all the more fantastic – a long weekend is a treat. Yeah, the compensatory work we need to do some other Saturday for this unscheduled day-off is fine too. But no one really considers the prospect of actually participating.
So if we don’t decide the people who rule and represent us, we have no control over the results we get. No point complaining then… A 7-10 lakh vote bank will make any politician worth his salt jump out of his couch… A fraction of this can swing results in any election. Yet, we don’t care to assert ourselves. Standing in queues on those election days is a thing to be done by my maid and the watchman. I am too cool to be seen standing in a queue for casting my vote. Not until Election commission comes up with Online Voting – where, as a keyboard enthusiast that each one of us is – we will mark a 110% poll (Indian keyboard junkism is illustrated in all online polls – whether it’s electing Amitabh Bachhan as the Man of century or Sachin as best batsmen in the world, or getting Taj into the list of new Seven Wonders…)
So, till Election commission does an technology upgrade… our roads will remain the same.
Yeah…I won’t be surprised if the last one too shows up some day on one of these channels.
And why not? Aaj Tak began this crazy marketing gimmick few years ago – and what a gimmick. TV channels in partnership with the service providers have been raking in a cool moolah for a while… each time a gullible viewer yields to the exhortations and punches away an SMS, either voting on some irrelevant questions or sending in a comment which no one cares for. And of course, there are millions of such gullible viewers in this land of tube addicts. The folks at the channel who worked out this idea for the first time must have got a hefty bonus for it…
But what amuses me beyond limit is the stupidity of the questions… and worse still the stupidity of thousands of viewers who actually spend their own money (sending one such sms costs anything between Re1 to Rs6) responding.
Do people really fall for the idea that their SMS will cause a change of heart in Bharti Yadav… or does CNN-IBN claim to have a power to influence the judges with the revenue they earn from the poll campaigns.
Do people believe their SMS will pressurize BCCI into picking Saurav again (he did it finally)… or does the Star News mean to tell the viewers that they can actually buy him a place in the team with the revenue they earn…
Or they can sign up the President for a image makeover contract with some good deal, or convince the Bacchaans, Rais and the stars to fall in-line with the public opinion.
If not, then what compels these people to really send in those SMS’s…?
To my understanding, the closest explanation that exists is – a false sense of control. People get a false sense of ego satisfaction and control over forming an opinion – which, given the total lack of control we otherwise have in spite of our democratic setup, is a huge boost for the otherwise battered middle class. Having failed to get their due from politicians they elected, the bureaucracy that abuses them, the judiciary that keeps them waiting, the taxes that don’t benefit them… the thousands of actions they take daily without a power to change anything and not off their own sweet will – people get a false sense of salvation – when they get to give an opinion. Not withstanding that this vote of their makes no difference to anything at all – except to their next cell phone bill. Not withstanding that the result of all such polls is more predictable than the way Indian cricket team will loose next time. Not withstanding that this poll and its result will be forgotten the moment the next breaking news happens…
Reminds me of a dialogue in “You’ve Got Mail” where Tom Hanks’ character says something like –
"The whole purpose of places like Starbucks is for people with no decision-making ability whatsoever to make six decisions just to buy one cup of coffee. Short, tall, light, dark, caf, decaf, low-fat, non-fat, etc. So people who don't know what the hell they're doing or who on earth they are, can, for only $2.95, get not just a cup of coffee but an absolutely defining sense of self: Tall! Decaf! Cappuccino!"
That’s the story of this Indian middle class viewer too…
